IT Problems.

Dear IT Support,

Eighteen months ago I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2
which I'd used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently
conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and
run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is also incompatible with several
other applications, such as Lads Night Out 3.1, Football 2 and Playboy 6.1.
Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better.

A shareware beta-programme, Party Girl 2.1 which I tried had many bugs and
left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several
weeks. Eventually I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the
same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other
they caused severe damage to my hardware.

Sensing a way out, I then upgraded to Fiancée 1.0 only to discover that this
product soon had to be upgraded (at great cost) to Wife 1.0, which I
reluctantly agreed to because, whilst Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my
available resources, it does come bundled with Free Sex Plus and Cleanhouse
2000.

Shortly after this upgrade however, I then discovered that Wife 1.0 can be
very unstable and costly to run. For example, any mistakes I made were
automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They
then resurfaced months later when I had forgot about them. Wife 1.0 also has
an automatic Diary Explorer and E-mail porn filter, and can,without warning,
launch Photostrop and Whingezip!

These latter products have no help files and I have to try and guess what
the problem is myself.

Additional costly problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
requiring Shoe Shop Browser for new attachments and also Hairstyle Express,
which needs to be reinstalled every other week.

Wife1.0 also spawns unwelcome child processes that drain my resources. It
also conflicted with some of the new games I wanted to try, stating that
they are an illegal operation. When Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Audi TT
programme it often crashes or runs the system dry.

Wife 1.0 also has a rather annoying pop-up called Mother-in-Law, which can't
be turned off.

Recently I've attempted to try Mistress 2000, but there could be problems. A
friend has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects the presence of
Mistress 2000 it tends to delete all my MS Money files before un-installing
itself."

Can you help ??

No

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Nein. Das ist queerdich. hahahaha. Let's see who can work out which isn't german.

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No, that is (queerdish, whats that?)

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Why Politicians are wankers:
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